[126] Inspire Yourself and Better Your Life

I write when I'm feeling inspired. Whether it's after an intense conversation, finding a new recipe, watching a documentary, trying on a new pair of clothes/shoes, stumbling upon cute more cute owls, playing with my niece and watching her smile and laugh, shopping for fresh veggies and fruits, or catching a reflection in the mirror.

Today I am inspired by my own willpower and persistence to better my health and self-esteem.

Let's take a step back to one life changing experience... In the fall of 2009 I went through a divorce. The fact that I was still living with my in-laws was so taxing on my emotions, overall attitude, and my physical well-being. I found myself wanting to sleep in all the time. I never wanted to eat at dinner time, but I'd often force myself to have a small serving of whatever my in-laws prepared. It was the simple fact that I had to sit in front of (or be in the same house as) my soon-to-be ex-father-in-law. On more than one occasion, I would leave the house a couple of hours after dinner to go grab Taco Bell, McDonald's, or Wendy's so I could feel full and escape the people I lived with. Even though I was eating fast food, I still kept to my simple and fairly light breakfast and lunch.

At the end of September 2009, I packed up all my belongings, drove halfway across the country and moved into my parents home. I noticed I had slimmed down quite a bit and was able to fit into some old clothes better than before. For as long as I can remember, I've always had a pooch belly. Sure, I've tried to workout and make it as minimal as possible, but for whatever reason that just hasn't been a result I've been able to achieve. So, I work around it. I dress myself to what I find flattering to my shape and figure.

October 2009

By December 2009, I had consumed more Whataburger than any human should ever consume. Towards the end of the month, I took a trip to see my best friend (whom I hadn't seen since I left Alaska in April 2008) and meet his soon-to-be wife for the first time. I was so uncomfortable in my own skin during the couple of days I visited them. And seeing the pictures afterwards just left me feeling so disappointed in myself for letting my weight get so out of hand.

Fast forward to March/April 2010. Shawno flew down to Texas to visit for my birthday. During his visit, we took a walk to the falls of Wichita River as well as driving to the top of Mt. Scott in the Wichita Mountains (which are more like hills, located in Oklahoma). The day we visited the falls, it was hot, humid, and we were all suffering as we tried to enjoy the beauty of the falls. My sister took photos of Shawno and I as we sat and posed on top of the rocks along the stairs. After looking at the photos, I said to my sister "This is how pregnancy rumors get started." I was disgusted with my entire mid-section. At the time, I would think to myself, this isn't so bad, I've seen worse days. Lying to myself, of course.

In July 2010, I made the decision to go vegetarian, starting August 1, 2010. I ate fairly healthy. Started bringing in more fresh veggies into my diet. I felt awesome. The problem? I was still overeating and still consuming way too much soda for my own good.

January 2011, I visited Texas to help throw a baby shower for my sister. It was on this trip that I truly decided I needed to make a change in my life. I was still fairly new to vegetarianism. I had just given up soda for the new year. I weighed more than my 6 month pregnant sister... and I just couldn't stand to look at my body any longer. I lived in hoodies and sweaters.

March 2011, I made a decision for myself. Drop 50 lbs. I was originally 210 in January, weighed in at 197 in March, and made a goal for 147 by March 2012. I bought a scale as a birthday gift to myself. That was the start of it all. Ate more fresh foods than ever before. Cooked meals at home as often as possible. I brought granola and yogurt to work for lunch. I'd grab a veggie delite at Subway if I didn't have time to pack a lunch.

It's now March 2012. I'm 4 days from the end of my year long goal. How am I doing? I've lost a total of 40 pounds since last January. I'm 10 pounds from achieving a 50 pound loss, and 23 pounds from reaching my goal weight. The reality of losing 10 or 23 pounds in four days is just not going to happen. It would be dangerous to lose that much in such a short amount of time! Haha! Am I punishing myself for not reaching that goal? ABSOLUTELY NOT! I've managed to drop 40 pounds! I went from a size 12 to an 8! I recently tried on size 6 jeans at American Eagle and THEY FIT! I didn't buy them because I want to lose some more from my mid-section before I buy new clothes.

I have never loved myself more than I do now. And I appreciate people who take notice of the difference I have made for myself.

In 2009, I didn't care what I put in my body, food wise.
In 2010, I made a choice to cut meat out of my daily diet.
In 2011, I made the choice to cut carbonated sodas out of my daily diet.
In 2012, I made the choice to continue being meat-free and soda-free... because it works for me.

Looking to better yourself? Pay attention to your own habits. Make a change for yourself. If diet programs work for you, go for it! If you need something more, do your own research!

The beauty of being a vegetarian is that I get to eat the foods I love.

Left: December 2009, Right: March 2012

"Where willpower is the muscle, self-discipline is the structured thought that controls that muscle."

[124] 36 pounds, and I ain't talkin' currency

In 6 weeks I will be coming to the end of a goal I set for myself 1 year ago.

Original post: Goal: Drop 50 lbs in 1 year

Last January, I weighed 210 pounds. I have never felt an extreme level of embarrassment and disappointment in myself until that moment. Often questioning myself, "How did I let this get out of hand?" Last March I weighed 197 pounds and decided, I've had enough of this. I must get this under control. I've lost a total of 36 pounds since last January and I still have another 27 pounds to lose before March 25, 2012. That's 6 weeks away! How do I plan on busting down those last 27 pounds? Staying positive, continuing to eat fresh & homemade foods, and quite a bit of cardio.

"I've had the urge to go running lately. I'll probably make it to the corner and have to turn around.
...I live on a corner house."

Quoting myself because I'm real cool.

When I started this journey I was wearing sizes 12 and 14. I'm now comfortably wearing sizes 8 and 9! In fact, I only have two pairs of jeans in 8's and one pair in 9 (which happen to be my yellow jeans from my Pichu costume). I honestly can't even remember the last time I was in the single digits. (Single digits for the single girl. Haaaay!)

I have received numerous comments and messages about my progress. People I haven't talked to in years have started to contact me just to say congrats and keep going. All these positives keep me going! Not that I'm relying on others to push me towards my goal, but it sure does help. So, thank you to everyone who has helped me through this. Thank you for taking a moment out of your day to let me know that you have seen and support the improvements and changes I have made in my life to better my health.

I love being able to walk into a grocery store or a restaurant and say "no" to something I don't need.

This picstitch photo sums up how I feel about myself.

I often get the urge to play dress-up now that I feel as beautiful on the outside as I do on the inside. :) Love yourself because there's absolutely nothing wrong with doing so.

1½ years vegetarian & 13 months soda free.

[121] My Life in a 5x8 Container

Have you ever looked around at all of your belongings? Deciding what size trailer to rent for a one-way move?
I have. Multiple times.

Not-so-long story short, Shawno and I broke up. I have been homesick for the last 6 months of 2011, so, with the breakup, it was time for me to move back home. New England just isn't for me, nor would I have been able to afford to stay there.

I packed up everything I owned in our apartment, shoved it in a 5x8 U-haul, and started on my 2230 mile drive home. This trip didn't come without its complications. Somewhere along the highway in Connecticut, drivers were making poor choices.

On more than one occasion, a few people had to slam on their brakes in front of me. If you've ever towed a full trailer, you'll know that slowing down takes a little extra work from your brakes. Unfortunately for me, my front driver side brake pads needed to be replaced. I made the decision to drive all the way to Virginia with brakes that sounded absolutely horrible. The day I arrived at Regina's, we stopped at the auto part store so I could pick up some brake pads, rotors, and other essential items. Finished the night with Chinese buffet for dinner, short trip to Babies R Us to get wooden toys for the kiddies, and a couple more stops for things before heading back to her house.

The next morning, I was up at 6am, and outside by 7am to start working on changing my brake pads and rotors. This was no easy task. I had trouble removing my front driver side wheel. For whatever reason, this thing would not come off. No matter how hard I pulled. (And yes, I did remove the lug nuts before someone tries to get smart.) Luckily, Regina contacted a friend to come out and help me. I am so thankful for this man. He also had a c-clamp I lacked. I had everything else I needed thanks to my trusty new tool kit!

After banging at the wheel with a hammer for a bit, it finally loosened and we were able to start changing the brakes. Mike changed the driver side (while I watched every step) as I have only done this once before. He had me turn the car around so I could change the passenger side pads and rotors. Exactly what my dad does when it comes to working on car things. So thankful for Mike!

People think I am crazy for spending the night at highway rest areas and Walmart parking lots. They're a lot safer than Lifetime makes you think. After leaving one part of Virginia, I spent the night in the parking lot of a familiar Walmart. (My family holds a reunion in that area every summer.) The drive was smooth up until Tennessee where I ran into some heavy rain. Major highways through major cities are always rough during rush hour. I was almost successful at planning my stops to avoid any rush hour traffic.

The weather continued to be rainy through most of Tennessee and on into Arkansas. The rain finally let up shortly after West Memphis. Smooth ride through Oklahoma, except when my energy drink kept me from napping. One final nap before I finished that last stretch of highway through Oklahoma, down into Texas. Walked in my parents front door at 6:30am Friday morning. Running on a Monster Rehab, I was unable to sleep until Friday night, after a day trip to Arlington to visit my sister-in-law (bff's wife) and kiddies. Best way to be welcomed home!

Now I'm back in my hometown and living in my parents house. Keeping it classy at 25.

I'm on the hunt for topics to blog about. I have a few things on my craft to-do list for friends. Included on that list is my next batch of hand-made items for Christmas time. As well as hand-made items I've promised to a few friends. :)

First of all, I must tackle my old bedroom. It has managed to become a bit of a storage room as my siblings have moved out, while my 16 year old sister has taken over our 22 year old sisters old room (for the sole reason that it has cable hookups). This project will require freshly painted walls, steam cleaning the carpet, and switching out furniture between this room and my sisters room.

The second project will be to tackle the computer desk which is currently in the kitchen's breakfast area. I fully plan on turning it back into a breakfast area, but first I want to remove the huge desk (that is barely used by anyone other than my little sister). Change it out for a smaller desk/table and get my dad a filing cabinet for his important documents.

The third, and biggest project, will be to clean out the "game room". Aiming to turn this room back into a computer room/den for my dad. When we first bought the house in the 90's, the game room doubled as my brother's bedroom and dad's computer room. If not a den, I would love to make this a guest bedroom. It would be nice to have a place for friends and family to stay when visiting.

Whew, so many projects. On top of that, I have less than 2 months left to reach my weight loss goal. Once I get my scale set up I'll figure out how much I have left to lose. Thanks to this unusually warm winter season, I'll be able to get out and go for walks/jogs/runs without freezing. Time to get back into eating more fresh veggies!

Happy Blogging!

[057] Get To Know Me: A to Z

A few of the blogs I follow featured their own A-Z. I figured why not do my own. Complete with pictures! It was fun finding a photo to go with each answer, although time consuming.

A. age : Twenty-five

B. bed size : Queen

C. chore that you hate : Bathroom, soap scum is the enemy

D. dogs : Allergic

E. essential start to your day : Glass of crystal light or coffee

F. favorite color : Greens

G. gold or silver : (White) gold

H. height : Five-three, five-four on a good day

I. instruments you play : Very limited guitar

J. job title : "Team Member"

K. kids : Someday :] Just nieces and nephews for now

L. live : Massachusetts

M. maiden name : Young

N. nicknames : Jas (Jaz/Jazz), Jazzy J (Jazzy Jaz), Min (MinMin), Jasmo, Insik

O. overnight hospital stays : My parents tell me I stayed in the hospital as a child for infantigo. I have zero memory of this.

P. pet peeve : Inconsiderate neighbors. People who pass on the right (while speeding). Poor behaved customers. Trashy behaviour/clothes. Most importantly, when my sister "pacmans" my bagel.

Q. quote : "The best zoom lens is your own two feet."

R. righty or lefty : Righty

S. siblings : Kenneth Ray, Jeanine Anne, Krystal Ashley

T. time you wake up : 8am - 10am

U. university attended : Zero college experience

V. vegetables you dislike: Water chestnut

W. what makes you run late : Hair and make-up.

X. x-rays you’ve had : Ankle, knee, and teeth.

Y. yummy food : Potato everything, salads of all sorts, mango and coconut

Z. zoo animal : Owls, bats, and zebras